Learder and follower

Yesterday, I had a great Saturday which was a meaningful day. I have joined an activity from BLIA to celebrated Wesak day. This activity's duration is 30 and 31 may, 2 days. But, I only joined them for one day because tomorrow I have an early class. It's a pity. this activities had been separated into many different group and as usual, every year, started from secondary school, I am under a same group. My duty is invite important person which included VIP, Taoist priest, sponsors up to stage to give their speech and also confer them the gift to thanks them before begin the ceremony.

My group have 6 persons, 4 female and 2 male. We have to gather at noon to comprehend our duty and also prepared well the gift. After knew each other, we started communicate. It's fun to knowing each other. Of course, every group have a leader to conduct the group members. After the leader had explained everything, they have no question at all, so I thought that every of us understand and know what to do. But when the activity has began, 3 of my group members doesn't clear what their duty, thus, everything goes wrong... some invited wrong person, some do not invited. And when we confer the give, some have get the gift and some do not. Terrible...

Of course, the leader get angry and condemned us...hai~~At that time, I realized that the important of efficiency communication and also listener's attitude, leader have to know that everyone of us have different comprehension about what he/she said. Eventually, listener have to ask question if they do not understand and do not pseudo, pretend know. I wish that they will do well in this night. And also hope they will not repeat the same mistake again.

If You Seek Amy by Britney Spears

Three days ago (Thursday), a bunch of college friends and I went to Mid valley's Golden Screen Cinemas to watch Terminator Salvation. At first, we intended to catch the 3.00pm show but as it was the first day of screening, it was fully booked, so we landed up buying tickets for the 4.10pm show. However, I will not be talking about Terminator Salvation in this post. It was just that this outing led to the discussion Daniel and I had in the car after the show.It was 5.30pm, the roads were very jam; Daniel and I were stuck in the car for at least one hour before we reached my house.

Daniel's car radio was on as usual, tuned to Hitz.FM. Somewhere along the journey, the song "If You Seek Amy" by Britney Spears was aired. That then reminded me of what my sister told me about this song. I then asked Daniel if he knew the controversy of the title of the song, but he had no clue. I realized that many people are not aware of the undertone of this song title, so here I will be sharing how the song writers have used language to imply another meaning to the song title.

If you listen carefully to the lyrics, part of the chorus containing the song title as below:

Love me hate me, say what you want about me,
But all of the boys and all of the girls are begging to if you seek Amy.

Does the last line make any sense to you? It depends on how you perceive it, but to many, this does not make sense if the words are taken at face value.

The song writers were able to use euphemism to create a pun out of the title of this song, by using betters words to replace the real meaning of the intended conveyed message. If you listen carefully to the pronunciation of the song title, you will be able to guess what message is trying to be conveyed.

If sounds like F
You sounds like U
See sounds like C
kA sounds like K
my sounds like Me

Put it all together, and there you have it. The true meaning of the song. In the context of language, this is also known as a double entendre. It is a phrase which can be understood in two ways. For example in this song, the first meaning is pretty much straightforward but the second meaning is not straightforward and in a way, it is inappropriate and definitely not allowed.

In my opinion, I find it fascinating that these song writers were creative enough to come up with such a phrase to convey a message that would otherwise have been disapproved by the public if expressed in the actual words. Now that you know the hidden meaning behind the song, what is your opinion? Don't you think that this is a great way to communicate when you do not want to be too straightforward? Or even a great way to swear at somebody without being obvious?


Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei

"Human" Communication??

Now, I just came back to my home which is in Segamat, Johor. Actually, I arrived my hometown by coach around 9.15p.m, after my parents picked me up, they straight away bring me to a place - a strange place that I never been there before. Honestly, I don't know how to name that place, that place is full of statue of god which is almost look alike a temple, but, it is not for believer to pray however, inside the temple have a leading character, a person who can exchange the role to become 'someone' else who is not exist in this real world. Get it?? In fact, this is a part of Chinese belief.This picture was took when the main character (MC) has been turned into other character. The believer called him God of third prince.MC was shaking his whole body until he success to let the third prince replace himself. Third price started conversation with the believer.

SEE!!! He was sucking the baby bottle which is contain milk. He continued told us what he wanted and we have to appease him whatever he said. Blindly obedience.He want candy, bananas and apple in a large amount.

The guy who was wearing the black clothes actually was a translator. I don't think so that the believers understand the way he spoke, for me, I 100% don't get what he was said, sound funny, really! He can't sat in his own chair, however, he run and walked around! And of course, the believers will followed. But then, I realized what was the believers purpose - to get a 4 digits number...LOTTERY!!!

To me, this was the crazy thing, I totally don't believe the third prince, because he really fake at all, his body movement, pronounce ,expression in eyes and face I don't know how to describes. Is this consider as 'human' communication occur in non-exist and exist human???

LISTENING: How Does It Feel?

The shampoo formed on my palm while my imagination ran wild through my past experiences. And I only had 40 minutes left before I stood right in front of all friends.

It all happened at the Leadership Camp about two months ago. On the last night, Mr Joel randomly picked three of us - Davka, Niraj and I to present a brief speech about past experiences. By the time came, my mind was still emptied with a specific topic. The three of us were called out of the hall and Niraj was assigned to be the first presenter, came Davka and lastly, me.

Niraj started to talk about his happiest moment when his father bought him tickets to watch the semi-final FIFA World Cup in Germany a few years back then. Unfortunately, when he was talking the rest of the crowd was not paying attention. Everyone was busy talking, even the ones I least expected him or her to be so rude to Niraj. Due to time constraint, Niraj couldn't manage to finish his speech on his saddest moment that had ever happened.

Davka stepped up confidently, determined to change the behaviour of the audience. She began about her journey all the way from Mongolia till Malaysia. It was exciting traveling from so far though there were times when she missed her family. The audience remained noisy, some unseated and distracting Davka's attention. Many little funny mischievous things happened it between. Obviously, Davka felt a little humiliated and angry. This must have been planned earlier by the other lecturers, I thought.

Finally, Mr Joel stepped forward together with Niraj and Davka. Mr Joel explained to everyone on the floor about the importance of listening and paying our respects to the speaker. Everyone was all ears. It has definitely taught each of us a lesson or two. Davka confessed about her feelings towards the ways her friends treated her when she wanted to share her priceless experience and Niraj felt the same, too. After that, it was my turn.

Since I wasn't given any specific topic so I randomly spoke about the misconceptions that people have on me. Surprisingly, everyone paid full attention. It really touched my heart knowing that a person's attention could make such a big difference in myself. Overall, I was glad that I was given a chance to say out things that had always been at the back of my mind. Thank you, Mr Joel. =)

PS: I'm still wondering what would have Niraj talk about his saddest moment. =(


Sign-ed off,
PANG YUEN CHENG (QUEENIE)

The Listeners

In our lives, we constantly face challenges and obstacles. Some are easily dealt with, yet for some of us we need professional guidance and help. When we do, we turn to psychologists. Psychologists are commonly thought to be those who deal with mentally unstable or those who have completely lost their minds. However, this is to a certain extent not true. Psychologists are in fact professionals who are involved in helping others live healthy and productive lives, as well as solving life's problems. On the other hand, psychiatrists are similar to psychologists, but instead are certified in treating mental disorders. This means the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist is that a psychiatrist is able to prescribe medication to his or her patients whereas a psychologist is only eligible to give advice.

Nevertheless, whether they are responsible for prescribing psychiatric medication or not, both professionals need to be good listeners. They need to know that listening to their patients require effort; they need to let their patients know that they are there for them. On top of that, people who make better listeners are those who are more people-oriented. Therefore, people who have people-oriented listening tend to understand how others feel and generally make better psychiatrists and psychologists. On the contrary, those who have insensitive listening are not advised to pursue either profession.

Furthermore, psychiatrists and psychologists who are empathic listeners are able to put themselves in their patients shoes. However, when it comes to advising patients, both professionals have to be careful with what advice they give. Giving inappropriate advice could cause suicidal tendencies of their patients and the end of the road for their career. When giving advice, a few solutions to solve the patients problem should be considered in order to expand the probability of recovery. Most importantly, both psychiatrists and psychologists should be very strong minded so that they do not get emotionally involved with the patient's challenge.

Psychiatrists and psychologists are both responsible for holding a patient's information and problems private and confidential. Psychiatrists and psychologists are also expected to be impartial to the patient's problems. They are expected to hold a cool front to exhibit stability to the patient. Any other reaction on their part could upset the patient further.

Being branded as insane when you see a psychologist is now obsolete; whenever you need advice on mental health, relationships, stress, anxiety, depression, substance and even sexual abuse, do not be afraid to consult a psychologist. We should feel no shame if we need help; life is full of ups and downs. To those out there who are struggling in unimaginable situations, "It is essential to our well-being, and to our lives, that we play and enjoy life. Every single day do something that makes your heart sing." (Marcia Wieder).


Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei

presentations

In college we always have to give presentations, wearing formal clothes and looking presentable. For example, last semester i gave a presentation on how to make a paper lantern and had to wear formal. Personally i found it just a bit weird, maybe cause i'm not used to it, but it gave me a smart and more profesional look and image.

The way we look affects how people percieve us, but our body language and our choice of words and the way we talk has the greatest long term effect i believe. if we choose our words wisely and make the topic we are presenting interesting and lifely you leave a lasting impression. This is very important as otherwise you may bore your students outta their minds. And thats not what you want to achieve.

Like today i had to give a presentation together with another friend of mine. I dont know how i did, but i do know i made some mistakes like we all tend to do when we feel a bit nervous. I stuttered a few times, didnt know where to look, couldn't keep my hands straight (i kept rubbing them together), and reading from the slides. Although i noticed some of the mistakes i was making, i couldnt bring them undercontrol very much.

To improve our presentation styles i believe we must prepare, be self concious and contolling, and practice. This will help us to convey our message and information clearly and in an appropriate communication style.
To my friends who had to listen to me presenting, i hope i didnt bore you guys outta your minds...
cheers

Our emotions effect our communication

we constantly change our emotions or moods from one day to the next and from one moment to the next. at one point of time we are happy, then something happens such as we spill some coffee onto our shirt and we explode and get pissed off. our emotions include being happy, sad, angry, excited, nervous, annoyed, sleepy, hungry and a few more.

i'm a simple example to use to show how my emotions effect my communication styles. like today afternoon, after having 2 classes in a row i was starving and had a third class waiting for me. before that i was relatively happy and talked and joked more, but then i just started to get easily annoyed and less talkative. after eating again i was fine. in this short period of time my communication style had changed already just because i was hungry.

although this was only a mild change, sometimes the change can be severe. if a person is happy and u ask 'how are u?' you'll get a good chatty respons, after a few minutes after he got a phone call from his girl friend wanting to break up, he may be angry and shout at you.

for each emotion we have, we have a different way of communication that comes with it. these are the general ones
happy = chatty and cheerful communication style
angry = unfriendly and even rude communication style, often leads to arguments
annoyed = sarcasm often gets involved and it often turns to the more angry side
excited = jumpy and elaborative communication style
sleepy = more of an unresponsive communication style follows this.

there are more but these i believe are the main ones. so if someone seems to be in a bad mood, better be careful of what you say and do cause you might just make it worse.

LANGUAGE: Does Your Name Sound Funny?

Some find it unique; some find it hard to pronounce, but my name is Queenie. As far as I'm concerned, I was named after a kinda-hearted young lady in a classical movie. My aunt gave it to Daddy, who wanted to name me Debbie. After a while, Debbie was eliminated because it sounds almost similar to "Daddy". I have friends who called Harrison, whom we made it short to Harry (hairy) and Brian which we made it into Bra. It all gets very funny.

I even have plans on what to name my kids in the future. Some people may wonder why would a parent give funny names to their children. For example, Angelina Jolie's adopted son is called Maddox, which sounds like mad dogs to me. Meanwhile, Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter is called as Apple. Below are a few Asian names which bring both obvious and hidden meanings. Warning: This post may be a little offensive but they are all for laughters purpose.

Darriah (a popular Indian name) – Not everyone knows the spelling and pronounciation of diarrhea, but it sounds like that!

Hardick (a Hindi name) – Do not spilt the name into two. Anyway, the owner of the name will be attracting a lot of women.

Dough – It's either you want the child to sound cute as a doughnut or fats from the doughnut.

Dick – Tell me about it.

Pinky – Sounds like a trying-to-act-dumb girl to me, but I don't see we have Greeny, Blueny or Yellowy. So why Pinky?

Fanny – A euphemism for butt?

Phyllis – Congratulations Phyllis, you’re Syphilis free.

Jesus – Imagine when you are tired of your son's little tantrums and you go, "Jesus! Jesus, stop that!". Do not blame God.

Harry – It’s terrible when you have hairless legs and are called Harry.

Sukhdeep (popular Punjabi name) – Let your imagination runs wild when you spilt the name in two.

And the list goes on...

Keep It Short and Simple.

When naming your kids, think precisely of how a baby’s name should be - meaningful for the baby and the parents, simple in pronunciation and spelling. Keep in mind that your child will grow up eventually to an adult. Your daughter may sounds cute with Twinky at the age of 2 but the society will be laughing off their heads when she shows her business card with her name printed on it. Give a name that your child will be proud off.

Thought of a name?

Finally, you have one meaningful name for your child! Double check the name through internet or ask opinions from friends and family. Make sure it has no weird meanings in other languages or even belong to infamous celebrities. Before I end my post, I would like to share a joke about three young men.

Three young men from China -Bu, Chu and Fu flew to America to look for jobs. Nevertheless, to be an American citizen they have to change their names into English names. Bu decided to be named as Buck, while Chu wanted Chuck. As for Fu, he decided to go back to China.

I apologize for any conflicts along the post. But most of all, I love my name very much because my Nie (Queenie) sounds like hoNEY. =) What about yours?

Source: Funny Asian Names

Sign-ed off,
PANG YUEN CHENG (QUEENIE)

Facebook

Facebook, being a free of charge social networking website, is the second largest social network on the web. Facebook was created by Mark Zuckerberg, at that time still a student at Harvard University in America, who ran it as his hobby. Facebook membership was at first limited to Harvard University students only, but then slowly expanded over the years to anyone who was 13 years old and above.

On Facebook, users are allowed to carry out interpersonal communication by using this feature "Wall", which provides a section in Facebook profiles where other users can leave messages to others. When users have read the message, the wall allows users to reply the message, making it possible for dyadic communication. This mode is known as "wall-to-wall" mode. Besides the wall feature, Facebook also introduced an instant messaging application called "chat", where its functions are similar to that of any other online instant messaging system, just that "chat" is carried out in Facebook's website.

Another feature provided by Facebook includes the ever so popular photos application, where users are given an option to upload albums or individual photos. These successfully uploaded photos can be viewed by others through the person's profile unless set at private. However, for most users, posting the correct photos are important. Posting inappropriate photos of oneself could cause a long lasting damage to ones reputation, as anyone who views the photos would perceive and judge the person from the photo, which might cause others to have a seriously bad impression.

As Facebook does not require face to face communication, it makes it easy for anyone to construct various identities. Facebook applications such as "chat" involves communication through the computer, also known as computer mediated communication, which allows a person to disguise his or her true identity. For example, the people users meet online tend to be more sociable and friendly. The online friendship developed over time could lead to the urge of wanting to personally meet the other party. However, this can be extremely dangerous as there are times where the other party has other intentions such as murder or rape which users are usually unaware of.

Although Facebook has become one of the most common hobby among the young generation, users should still know that we can never fully trust another through the internet. Even though there have been many happy endings from relationships developed from Facebook, there have been even more tragic and unhappy ones. Personally, I prefer to develop relationships the conventional way; tangible is the way to go for me!


Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei

LANGUAGE: How Does Language Trick People?

What does life-is-good mean to you?

Well, in my opinion, life is great when there are plenty of things to learn in life because I don't have much talents but I am very proud because I learn most of the things on my own. Anyway, here comes the fun part. If you are born with incredible skills, for example mathematical or musical skills, you can't teach people how to do that. However, if you were bad at the beginning and master it later on, you can guide people on how to do that because you have experienced it yourself. Today, I would like to share a trick on how to influence someone to do your favours by giving them choices.

First, we have to understand: 'Output' of our brains must be logically linked to the 'Input'. For examples,

1. If I ask you in English, "What is your name, Miss?" (input), your answer will probably be, "I am Queenie" (output). Nevertheless, if I ask you in English, "What is your name Sir?", it's illogical to answer in Malay, "Nama saya George Bush."

2. If someone asks you, "What is your name?", you can't reply, "I love roti canai." This is because the output doesn't link with the input.

Ever wonder why an insurance agent can meet you up even you don't really want to as you know he will be selling something to you? This is because they never ask you, "Are you free for dinner tonight?". If they do, your answer can be either, "Yes, so you can steal my money." or "No, I need to do my laundry tonight." and so on... Powerful salesmen ask, "Are we having dinner tonight or tomorrow night?". Now your answer has to be logically linked to the question, unless you are really not free on both nights. Most of the time, you would pick the better answer which is tomorrow night.

You can try this trick on other people!

Situation 1: While ordering Char Kuay Teow, ...

Boss: How many eggs do you want? 1 or 2?

You don't even want an egg.

Situation 2: At a boutique, ...

Sales girl: Ma'am, would you like to pay by cash or credit card?

You don't even plan to buy.

The "choices" you propose is very vital. We give them choices where we both want. They pick either one, they fall into our trap. Instead of giving them both what we want, we can give them A or B where A is what you want while B is an extremely stupid choice to be chosen. For examples,

1. Your friend asking you to hang out with them: Come on! Are we friends or not?

Actually there's nothing to do with friends or not, you can always choose to go home.

2. Your boyfriend: Do you want me to watch Batman or Lord of the Rings?

Actually he just wants to make sure you don't say High School Musical.

3. God: Do you want to go to heaven or hell?

Actually, ....

Even if you don't want to use the trick, knowing it prevents you from falling into other people's trap. The next time when someone uses this trick on you, look at them and point, "Don't use that trick on me!". =D

Source: AhYap's Blog

Sign-ed off,
PANG YUEN CHENG (QUEENIE)

Different characters different communication

Not only women 's conversations are focus more frequently on feelings, relationships, personal problems and satisfaction but sometimes it will also appear these phenomena to men too. Why I have this opinion, cause I am an outstation student of course I will keep contact through mobile phone to my family at least 3 times per week and the conversation duration between me and my family can last to 1 more hours each conversation.

A lot of time I felt like fascinated and amused to talk with my mum, dad, sister and also brother, sometimes even talk to my grandpa. Undeniable, although we all have genetic connection, however, each of my family member talk in different style and different thinking. Usually, my younger sister will tell me the things happened in my family,no matter is bad, good and allowed or not. Allowed- when my mum fall into sick, she will warned my sister do not transmitted this circumstance to me, mum worried that I will get distraction in study. She is a talkative person.

Now, divert to my younger brother. He is a person who are not correspond to reality. He often talked the nonsense to me, about his "girlfriend",how many girls he have chased and rejected, and he keep saying that he want to dropout and refused to continue his studying anymore until now. He told me that he better work rather waste mum and dad's money. I am extremely disagreed with him, but my mum agreed with him. Mum said we can't force him if he really want to. My grandpa, keep repeating say the same thing about his corporation, he is more excited and willingness to say more once I agreed and praised to him.

Next character is my dad. My dad's ostensible felt like don't like talk so much, but,in private, when nobody around dad, he will talk to mum non-stop until my mum also don't understand what dad actually said. Although mum didn't understand, however she don't interrupt dad to clarify, it was because mum said :" Your dad seem like don't care what actually he said I can understand, as long as he understand what he talk about." From here i observed that not only women but also men talk to fulfil the satisfaction. My mum?? Every things are related to her.

I Love My Family!

Facial Expressions

Facial expression is a type of non verbal communication. Whether we like it or not, we constantly use facial expressions to express ourselves. Facial expression is considered a type of communication as it conveys the emotions of an individual to the other party. Most of the time, hiding our facial expression is almost inevitable. Even if we really want to, we usually show a brief facial expression before resuming our neutral expression. Due to this, people constantly read other people's facial expressions rather than believe what the other person has to say. However, having said that, facial expressions are not always accurately interpreted and perceived.

The most obvious feature of the face that affects our facial expression is our eyes. Just by looking at one's eyes, we can almost tell how the person is feeling. According to research done by Boston College professor Joe Tecce, stress levels are revealed by blink rate. For example, a person who is angry, his or her eyes would widen and glare with great intensity. On the other hand, a person who is very irritated would roll his eyes, indicating that he is fed up. Sometimes, when one is in love or extremely elated, their eyes have this sparkle and are brighter than normal.

Our mouths also play an important role in determining our facial expression. When we are in shock or in awe, our jaws drop. When we are cynical, we exhibit a smirk. When we are happy, we wear a smile. Besides that, the flaring and wrinkling our noses also form our facial expressions. For instance, when we smell something smelly, we usually wrinkle our nose. When we are filled with anger, our nostrils tend to flare up.

But yet the worst facial expression that we have no control over is blushing. Most people blush, and more often than not it is a sign of embarrassment. This only serves to embarrass us further!

It can be said that facial expressions are stronger than words. Since facial expressions are categorized under body language, people tend to focus more on it when communicating with others as it is harder to conceal. Therefore, the next time you intend to hide your emotions, be careful not to let the cat out of the bag from your facial expression! Lastly, always wear this facial expression - a smile... because it goes a long way.


Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei

Cast away! the importance to humans to communicate

Just a couple of days ago I watched the movie cast away. It’s a really good movie like many of the others that stars Tom Hanks. The movie showed me, among other things, the importance of human communication to the mental and somewhat physical health.

The movie is about a person whose plain crashes in the middle of the ocean on an empty island with no escape until more then 4 years later. In that time he had no human contact and at first could only talk to him. But this wasn’t enough for him…. So after some time he made a volley ball into his friend. At first he felt uncomfortable talking to a ball. However, as time past he became inseparable and the ball was the only thing he could talk to. This was obviously a linear conversation with the ball (he named him Wilson after its brand) not giving any feedback or response. He soon learned to take his talks as something the ball was saying to him and so there was always a conversation.

After he had managed to escape the island, he lost Wilson in a storm and this was probably the saddest part of the movie. He lost his only friend and the only thing he could sort of communicate with. Then he was finally rescued and he went back to what he had known before the plane crash. Of course a lot of things had changed including partially on how he communicated.

The movie really makes clear of the importance of communication for humans, if to other humans, themselves, or to objects. Without communication we would not be able to survive. This is a fact in my point of view and I believe most people will agree with this. Imagine you were the only person left on earth, how long could you survive before going mentally unstable or killing yourself?

CAST AWAY is a really good movie and I encourage everyone to watch it at least once.

Cheers

Comprehension

Just now I went to interviewed which is a part time job for studio photo event. I found that, beside the interviewees need to attire thierself to give the interviewer good impression at first sight, the most important thing are 2 elements which is efficiency communication and comprehension between interviewer and interviewee. If interviewee do not have this 2 elements, how will the interview process goes smooth and unobstructed? Subsequently,one taboo thing interviewee must evade is tension. Once interviewee get into nervous, sure they will not perform well and lose their confidence when the interview is process. So, the best solution to resolve nervous is interviewee can try to have some communication with other interviewee, through this way, communication tend to reduce the tension.

Interviewee must to know what kind of language is use to communicate. Actually language can be more powerful when we apply it with proper way - manner. Even interviewees do not understand or can not heard clearly what interviewer asked, if they want interviewer repeat the question, they have to say please, can you, sorry, etc.. in order to show interviewee attitude and manner. That is good if interviewee able to apply euphemism language to replace the 'rude' words. In addition, try to pronouns the correct word which is based on phonological rules that help interviewer and interviewee understand each other. In case, if interviewees pronouns wrongly, their origin meaning might be misconstrued and misunderstand. Sometimes, it also might occur the oppose meaning which crop up a joke or make interviewer felt uncomfortable.

Thus, interviewees must distinct what how they make an efficiency communicate and be comprehend the question before answer it. Like just now, I observed that interviewees who had good communication and able to expressed what they think, the duration of interview was longer than interviewees who do not have. and it was very obvious that interviewees who had confidence and who does not have. Therefore, please master and grasp your language. It really tend to gain the communication and comprehension well.

perception

When we see someone for the first time they automatically give us an impression, which we base our perception upon. Perception is what we think of a person, it can be good, bad, funny, or confusing. Perception changes with the more you learn about that person and how you decide to interpret they’re actions and points of view.

If you see a homeless guy for example, your first perception of him would be that they are perhaps lazy, unfriendly or even rude. But if you would actually hear his story and get to know him your perception might change drastically, this may be because he might turn out to be a really nice person who might have just given up on life, for example.

I had experienced before that I had a bad perception of a person I knew many years ago. We met again not all to long ago and my perception changed for the better. The person had seemed to have changed for the better. So we began to hang out again together with other old friends of ours and it turns out that my fist perception had been correct.

Basically perception is linked to human communication because we decide to communicate with people differently considering of what we think of that person. If we percept a person to be nice, we will communicate with them in a more gentle manner being nicer. However, if we percept a person to be not of good nature we may avoid conversation or be rude and unacceptable of that person. Luckily for some people perception does change for the better but 4 others not so luckily.

Cosplay, Comic, Anime and Games Exhibition (C2AGE) 2009

C2AGE 2009 COMMITTEE MEMBERS

Cosplay, Comic, Anime and Games Exhibition (C2AGE) 2009 was an event organized by the event sphere of Help Matriculation Center's Leadership and Development Sphere on 16th May 2009, Saturday at 11.00am to 6.00pm. This event took months of planning and work by the C2Age committee and being the secretary of this event, I am pleased to announce that C2AGE 2009 was a great success. C2AGE 2009 was organized to encourage people to appreciate and dwell in the world of fantasy and imagination. At the same time, we hoped to enlighten the participants regarding the beauty of anime as well as the culture of Japan.This event was also aimed to narrow the gaps between different groups and interests among youths.

The C2AGE committee started off with ten members, and slowly grew to thirty as the event day drew closer and closer. The committee had weekly meeting on Fridays, from 12.30pm to 3.00pm at the Department of Student Affairs Student Council Room. The weekly meetings involved different types of communication, which includes small group communication as well as public communication. The small group communication refers to the times when the main committee of C2AGE sat down and discussed problems faced, our sponsorships and also ticket sales. However, the public communication also occurred when Hong Chun and Mr Murali, our lecturer advisor, conducted meetings and spoke in front of the committee to update everyone.

During the event, public communication was also seen when Damian Khaw, the master of ceremonies (MC), stood on stage to host our event as well as conduct competitions and brief the participants about our programme. Damian consistently spoke to the audience to keep the event moving and entertaining. During the opening ceremony, speeches were delivered by the ambassador of Japan to Malaysia, His Excellency Masahiko Horie, the director of Help Matriculation Center, Mr Dhanesh Balakrishnan, president of C2AGE, Tan Hong Chun and the youth ambassador of ANIMAX, Miss Hannah Tan.

To advertise and publicize our event, the committee used the media as a tool for mass communication. An advertisement was published in the Star newspapers on 14th May 2009, Thursday. Furthermore, press from the Star newspapers and Nan Yang Siang Bao were also invited to attend our event. Write ups and pictures are expected to be published in 17th May 2009, Sunday newspapers.

Overall, C2AGE 2009 was a huge and great success. The event would not have been a success if all committee members did not have communication competence and undying dedication. To be a part of this organization has been a privilege and a once in a life time experience. Although it drained me, it made me grow and it taught me that we must have communication to work as a team. I was blessed that my peers were fun and definitely communicative! Congratulations to everyone!


Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei

PERCEPTIONS: What You See is What You Get.

Recently, I have read a few articles regarding perceptions and would like to share it here.

These are statements the people who said them are convinced they're true.

Top 3 All-Time Stupid Quotes.

#3. The earth is the center of the universe.
Ptolemy, The Great Egyptian Astronomer, in the Second Century.

#2. Nothing of importance happened today.
Written by King George III on 4 July 1776. (American Independence Day).

#1. Everything that can be invented has been invented.
Charles H. Duell, US Commissioner of Patents, in 1899.


The following anecdote is adapted from Reader's Digest contributed by Dan P. Greyling is a good example of perception shift.

A friend of mine, returning to South Africa from a long stay in Europe, found herself with some time to spare at Heathrow Airport. She bought herself a cup of coffee and a small packet of biscuits. She was reading at her morning paper when she became aware a man was helping himself to her biscuits. She did not want to make a drama, so she leaned across and took one biscuit herself. By the time they were down to the last biscuit in the packet, she was very angry but still could not bring herself to say naything Then the young man broke the last biscuit into two, pushed half across to her, ate the other half and left. Some time later, she opened her handbag and was confronted by her packet of biscuits. She had been eating his.


The past two weeks have been the longest weeks for me, juggling with the new timetable. Many people may have not known how I felt and underwent everything from misconceptions and misunderstandings. There are many things that are needed to be taken into considerations when I plan my new college timetable. People around were giving me a very hard time. Anyway, if that is what they want to think of me, be it. What matters most is I am determined with what I need and want.

We should not be quick to judge, label or form rigid opinions of others, or ourselves.


Signed off,
PANG YUEN CHENG (QUEENIE)

COMMUNICATIONS: The Deepest Need of the Human Heart

Many people have left out the most important key to communication, which is listening. It is the deepest need of the human heart to be understood. Everyone wants to be respected and valued for who they are. Someone who is unique, one-of-a-kind individual.

To understand someone you must listen to them. Surprise! Most of us do not know how to listen. Here are five poor listening skills:

• Spacing out.
• Pretend listening.
• Selective listening.
• Word listening.
• Self-centered listening.

Spacing out is when someone talks to us but we ignore them because our mind is wandering off in another place. They may have something important to say but we are caught up in our thoughts.

Pretend listening happens all time. We pretend to listen but we are not paying much attention. We start making comments, such as 'yeah', 'uh-huh', 'cool', etc. Eventually, the speaker will get the hint and will feel he/she is not important.

Selective listening occurs where we take certain parts of the conversation that interest us. For example, your friend tells you about his talented brother in the army. All you hear is the word 'army' and say, "Oh yeah, the army! I've been thinking a lot about it lately".

Word listening means we only listen to the words, not the body language, feelings, or the true meaning. Your friend might ask you, "What do you think of him?". You might reply, "I think he's pretty cool". However, if you had been more sensitive, what she was really saying, "Do you think he likes me?". You will seldom be in touch with deeper emotions of people's hearts.

Self-centered listening is where we see everything from our personal point of view. Instead of being in another's shoes, we want them to stand in ours, like "Oh, I understand how you feel". But we don't really know exactly how does it feel.

What is Genuine Listening?

First, listen with your eyes, heart and ears. For example, notice the word that is emphasize in a sentence.

I didn't say you had an attitude problem.
I didn't say you had an attitude problem.
I didn't say you had an attitude problem.

Second, stand in their shoes. Before you can walk in another's shoes, you must first remove your own.

Third, practice mirroring. Mirroring is not judging and advising, but repeating meaning by using your own words with a warm and caring feelings.

Ask yourself, 'Which of the five poor listening styles do I have the biggest problem with?'. Try to go one day without doing it. ;D


Signed off,
PANG YUEN CHENG (QUEENIE)

Helping Each Other

Can you imagine that all people in this world become selfish, cruel, inhuman, ruthless, etc...seeing people suffering in bad situation but non of person will give hand to them??? If this situation became reality, the result will only came with one answer, that is... the end of the world-Doomsday. Non of the people will take care with each other again, whats a depression between human and what is the meaning to survive and exist in this evil world? No point to stay alive. Indeed, we all human need love from each other. Love can represented a lot of meaning from many respects, for instance, family, friendship, lover, etc...

The defination of empathy is ability to re-create another person's perspective, to experience the world from the other's point of view. Empathy is an important element to put yourself into other shoe and it also exists on human when we are born. If a person can appropriate use this inherent gene as well, we can considered that we are live in 'heaven' already- the place which is full with peace. Let visualizing, if one day while you walk in a street, misfortune, your handbag have stolen by a thief, you seek help from other but no one take notice of and just passed by you, what kind of feeling you will have?

Take a grievous case-earthquake in Ci Chuan,China. A lot of people from different countries had participated as volunteers and they also had a goal that is gave aid to the victims who really need help. These volunteers no only had sympathy to victims but is empathy.They are really concern and clear-cut about the victims felt incapable. Volunteers know their fear, depression and sadness. Goverment also took part of it, they provided reinforcements, foods, cloths and so on. Thus, we can seen how empathy so important apply in a person and might change this world to become more better.

Using body language and sign language as forms of communication

Body and sign language speak and mean just as much as normal words do in our normal everyday lives. Although for us, when we see someone using proper sign language, we often have absolutely no idea of what their conversation is about. They’re signs often don’t relate to the object they talk about. Body language is easier to understand to the average person. It’s easy to see when a person is nervous, happy, uncomfortable, angry, etc. a skilled eye and some practice or knowledge makes this very easy.

Sign language is generally used by deaf people, although also simple hand gestures are used in our everyday lives or for example also in wars or police operations. We often use these simple sign languages to communicate to each other. The deaf use much more complex gestures and hand movements which each mean something else. My sister learned sign language in YMCA for some time and managed to learn and understand it. Trust me it isn’t easy. Me, personally, followed her and the YMCA deaf members on a trip to Cameron Highlands, it was a lot of fun! Even though I didn’t understand most of what they were telling each other, and to me. I always needed someone to translate it to me. However, I learned that their form of communication is just as effective and often more lively then our normal conversations involving words.

In our daily lives we often use signs and body languages as a form of unconscious communication. For example, crossed arms means ‘I’m conserved and not entirely comfortable’ or a cheerful smile or a relaxed standing position and walking style means you are in a good mood and easily approachable.

My conclusion for this is that you should be aware of the importance of your and others body language. What it is saying. Its good to learn how you could control these body languages as not to make them to obvious in some situations, for example in an interview. Another important point I want to highlight is that many people think that people who use sign language can’t communicate well. This is only true when they communicate to us. These people have their own way of effective communication and deserve just as much respect as anyone else.

Short Messaging Service (SMS)

Short Message Service (SMS) is a communication service which allows the interchange of short text messages between hand phones. SMS is the most widely used communication method among people, with around 74% of hand phone users sending and receiving text messages daily. Although SMS does not involve two individuals conveying messages face to face, it is known as a type of verbal communication.

Nowadays, just about everyone uses abbreviations when typing their SMS, which is also known as SMS language. Many users prefer using abbreviations rather than spending more time typing out their messages in the proper spelling. Abbreviations used in SMS can be categorized into two, which consists of acronyms and short forms. An example of an acronym commonly used in SMS is "btw", which stands for by the way. By using this acronym, an individual only needs to type three letters instead of eight. Another type of abbreviation often used is short forms. When using short forms, only certain alphabets of an original word are used. For instance, "pls" is usually used in place of the original word, please, in SMS. The use of short forms also include using one alphabet or number that sounds like a part of a particular word, or even the whole word. These short forms include "b" that refers to the word "be", "4" that refers to "for" as well as "l8t" which refers to "later". Due to its frequent usage, shorthand used in SMS and instant messaging are often referred to as the cause of deterioration in the English language.

Even though SMS may seem like an easy way to communicate, it often causes misconceptions and misinterpretations. This is due to the fact that an individual is incapable of expressing their emotions when conveying a certain message using SMS as well as the fact that everyone perceives the same message differently. Take the phrase "I knew it" for instance. This phrase can be used to express both excitement and anger. For example, you receive a message that reads "I got the part in the musical audition!". After reading it, you reply "I knew it". By saying that, what do you really mean? Are you excited that your friend got the role? Or are you filled with jealousy and anger because you knew that you deserved the part more than he or she did?

Considering SMS does not involve face to face communication, people tend to turn to SMS when confronting or confessing their feeling to others. This is also known as escapism. The act of escapism is common among teenagers as SMS is often used to confess the feelings they have for one another. SMS is definitely a much preferred way to confess their feelings as they would not need to face rejection directly from that person which is harder to handle. SMS is also used when one wants to confront another who did something wrong. By using SMS, an individual need not face the "physical" wrath of the offended party.

To come to think of it, isn't it wonderful how the advancement of modern technology has allowed us to communicate in so many different ways, with using SMS being the preferred way? But with these technologies that do not require face to face communication, how would we ever know if the message conveyed was sincerely meant by the other? Have we lost the warmth in communication? Have we forgotten how to speak to each other?



Written by,
Hooi Kit Wei